Napoleon Dynamite's Adventures Flippin' Continue
by FoShizzle
Summary: UPDATE: Will be adding stories more rapidly now! Thank you everyone who wrote all the nice and helpful reviews, you were the inspiration to keep writing. Please continue to read and review! :D
1. Summer's New Boyfriend

At lunch

"Here's two bucks," Napoleon said, handing the lunch lady twenty dimes.

The lunch lady rolled her eyes as she counted the change.

"You're ten cents short," the lady corrected him.

Napoleon looked at her, very confused.

"I'll need ten more cents," she reminded him.

"I don't have any more money," he told her, turning his head to glance in the lunchroom.

"You aren't permitted to eat from this tray unless you pay two American dollars."

"What about pesos?"

"Napoleon, just give her a dime!" Don shouted from the line behind him.

"I said I didn't HAVE another dime, you stupid butt!" Napoleon shouted back.

"Please take a seat in the cafeteria now," the lunch lady instructed. "You may not have anything to eat today."

Napoleon took a deep breath and sighed as he grabbed his change off the counter. He walked over to his best friend Pedro. Pedro looked at Napoleon as he sat down across from him.

"Napoleon, where's your lunch?"

"I didn't feel like eating today."

Pedro continued eating his taco.

"Where's Deb?" Napoleon asked.

Pedro shrugged.

Napoleon needed something to keep himself occupied for the rest of the lunch period. He took out a notebook and began to draw.

Deb came out from the line, carrying her lunch. She saw Napoleon and Pedro already sitting at a table and walked over to sit with them.

"Hi Napoleon, hi Pedro," she said, sliding into her seat.

"Hello," Pedro said, taking his eyes off of his taco to look her way.

"What are you drawing, Napoleon?"

"A picture of Tina choking on a decroded piece of crap."

Deb raised her eyebrows. "That's a nice drawing."

"Thanks, I know," he said, focusing.

In the Hallway

"Napoleon, your shoe's untied," said one of Don's friends from the locker room.

"Yeah right, I'm not flipping falling for that."

"All right, then," he said laughing with his friends.

Napoleon glared as they walked off laughing. He put his notebook in his locker and closed it and began to walk to class.

He tripped on his shoelace and fell on his knees. His glasses flew off.

"Ugh!" He grunted. He reached for his glasses, and then he heard someone talking around the corner. It was Summer Wheatly. Now she was giggling.

"I'll see if I can make it," she said.

"That'd be great," the other guy said. Wait… guy? He sounded too GOOD to be Don. Not as ogre or flipping idiot-like. Who was Summer talking to?

"Well, I have to go. Meet me after school on the lot, okay?"

Napoleon peered around the corner from afar to get a glimpse. The guy was looking at her like she had gunk on her lip, or something.

"Um… David?"

"Oh, um," he stuttered, his gaze breaking off. "Right."

"Lot? After school?"

"Got it," he said.

During Class before Dismissal

Pedro closed his notebook and put it away.

"You're done with homework already?!" Napoleon asked, who was sitting beside him.

He nodded.

"Hey Pedro…" He started.

"Yes?"

"What would you do if I told you I was a secret agent?"

"What?" Pedro's blank expression didn't change.

"Nevermind."

"Like a spy?"

"Yeah, what would you do?"

"You would still be my friend."

"Well I'm undercover right now, believe it or not."

"Really?"

"Heck yes," Napoleon said, putting his notes in his binder. "Wanna help?"

"Okay."

The bell rang.

After school by the tetherball courts

"Just act like you're playing tetherball. Like you normally would."

"I thought we were already playing tetherball."

"We were. Now we're just gonna act like it."

"What?"

"Pedro, that's just what spies do. Gosh!" said Napoleon, squinting.

"So… we are spying?"

"Yes, on Summer Wheatly."

"Okay."

An awkward silence passed as the two continued smacking the tetherball around the pole.

"Why?"

"Reliable sources have been suggesting that she dumped her no good lousy fat boyfriend."

"Oh. Okay. And we are…"

"Confirming these reports."

"Summer's coming."

"Pedro, you're supposed to roger that! If it's not rogered, then this mission is OVER."

"Roger. Who is that?" he asked, pointing to the boy Summer was walking with.

"I think that's David," Napoleon said, scratching his head. "We can hear what they're saying if we hide in those bushes over there."

The two hunched over, and ran behind Summer and David. Napoleon dove in the bushes. Pedro stood there.

"Pedro, jump in!"

"This is my dad's good shirt. I cannot mess it up."

"You should have thought of that when you signed up to become a spy, come on, jump in!" Napoleon said.

Summer and David turned around to see Pedro talking to a bush.

"Hi Pedro."

"Hello."

"Is Napoleon in the bushes?"

"Yes," Pedro replied.

Pedro, Summer, and David all looked in the bushes at Napoleon.

"Chuck Norris kicked me in the bushes, GOSH what the heck would YOU do in a situation like that?!"

David raised his eyebrow. Napoleon glared back at him.

"Are you going out with David?" Pedro asked Summer.

Summer grinned.

"Yes," she answered, her smile even wider. The two walked off.

Pedro looked down at Napoleon.

"That was probably the worst display of spying I've ever seen in all time," said Napoleon, wiping twigs off his shirt.


	2. Good Friends and Old Times

Napoleon Dynamite's Adventures Flippin' Continue once more!

At the local bowling alley

Napoleon and Pedro watched Deb grab the bowling ball as the pins reset. She was very focused.

As she concentrated on the pins, Pedro took a sip of his root beer. Deb stepped forward and released the ball with finesse as the remaining pins were knocked off their resting point.

"You got like 4 feet of air that time," Napoleon observed aloud.

Deb smiled.

Pedro stood up, his name was now highlighted on the screen above.

He walked over to pick up a ball, quietly.

The pins now reset, and Pedro focused. He gracefully wiped out all ten pins in one blow.

Napoleon got up, but before he could pick a ball to use, he heard his name.

"Hey, it's Napoleon!"

That could be only one person, Napoleon thought to himself, turning around to face Don.

"OH, is it your turn? Well go on, don't let me distract you."

Napoleon glared at him before turning around to face the lane. He picked up a blue ball with an "8" on it. Blue was the color of ancient wizards that used to defeat menacing goblins during the Dragon Age.

Facing the lane again, Napoleon focused even harder. With a running start, he ran forward heavily, but because he was using bowling shoes and not his moon boots, his back foot tripped on his other heel, causing him to fall forward.

"Ugh!" he grunted as his ball flew into a bowling lane other than his own.

Don laughed at him from the back, hands on his hips.

"Way to go, Napoleon!" he sneered. "You got a gutter ball in someone ELSE'S lane. Guess that's progress!"

Deb and Pedro watched Don laugh at their friend. Don turned to them.

"What are you looking at?" asked Don.

The two remained silent.

"Psh," Don said, raising his eyebrows. "Know what, I'm out of here. I'm not gonna pay for Napoleon to roll gutter balls in my lane."

He headed for the exit, and Napoleon stood up, wiping his shirt.

"Are you okay?" Deb asked.

"Yeah… He's just really lucky I don't have my bow staff," Napoleon remarked.

Somewhere in Idaho

*_Upbeat 80's music playing_*

The sound of turning tires hitting gravel emerges from the highway as a large, orange van pulls into a Drive-Thru window. Pulling into the Drive-Thru, the music is turned down.

"Hey, hello? Anyone there?" the driver calls out.

No answer.

"HEY what makes you think I wanna kill the day here, c'mon! I just want some FOOD."

A crackling noise from the intercom starts up, and a voice is heard:

"Hello, welcome to 'Meaty N' Fries,' may I take your order, sir?"

"I'll have a small steak and some fries, thanks. Oh yeah, give me a drink, too."

Meanwhile—

The silhouettes of Napoleon, Deb, and Pedro on bicycles can be seen riding along in the evening.

"Pedro, where did you learn how to bowl like that?" Napoleon asked.

"My mother used to live near a bowling alley after she moved here from Mexico. She took me sometimes and would pay for us if we came with her. I guess I just got good after a while."

"Sweet!" Napoleon said, squinting.

"So, where do we go now?" Deb asked.

There was a silence as the three thought.

"We could go to my house," Pedro suggested.

Napoleon and Deb exchanged glances with a look of agreement on their face.

"Sure," Deb said.

The friends turned in the direction of Pedro's street and continued on.

About twenty minutes later, they had gotten to Pedro's neighborhood. Upon reaching his house, they parked their bikes on the lawn, confident they would not be stolen. They entered their friend's home.

"Pedro! Where have you been?" his older female cousin demanded.

"I've been out bowling with my friends," he said.

Deb waved. Napoleon stood still.

"You are LATE," she scolded. "Napoleon, I'm guessing your grandmother wants you home too because she called here earlier, asking if you were here!"

"Dang it!" he said, closing his eyes and tilting his head back.

Pedro and Deb looked at Napoleon, sorry that their friend had to leave.

"Well I better go…" he pointed out.

"Yeah, I guess you better," said Pedro's cousin impatiently.

"K, bye," as he ran out the door, grabbing his bike.

Napoleon biked home as quickly as he could, even though it would take him a good half hour at a fast pace. Fortunately, his dance moves had toughened up his leg muscles, and he was able to arrive within the time he had estimated.

He opened the door and stepped inside the small home. Ever since Kip had moved out it had just been his Grandma and himself living there.

"There you are, Napoleon!" his Grandma exclaimed. "Where the Sam Hill have you been?"

"With Pedro and Deb," he replied.

"Well I moved out some of the junk in your room for you…" his grandma began.

"What?" Napoleon groaned.

"We have a visitor. And he needs a place to stay."

There was a short moment of silence, as the visitor stepped in the kitchen, holding a plate with steak on it. He was wearing a white shirt and tie along with dress shoes.

"Hey there, Napoleon. Long time no see."

Standing there was none other than Napoleon's uncle, Uncle Rico.

Napoleon groaned.

"Ugh!"

TO BE CONTINUED.


	3. Trouble!

Napoleon Dynamite's Adventures RETURN for Part 3!

(-This chapter takes place immediately after Chapter 2-)

At Napoleon's House

*Silence*

"Why the flip is Uncle Rico staying in MY room?" Napoleon fumed.

"Napoleon, you really need to learn how to deal with things," his grandma told him. "Your uncle's staying here as long as he needs to because, well, that's just how it's gonna be. Not everything NEEDS an explanation.

"Thanks, Mom," he said, with his gaze still fixed on Napoleon.

"Why can't he use Kip's old room?"

"WELL, I'm sure I've said this more than I should have had to, but that's gonna be my party room, and I have no idea in heck how long he'll be staying, so you have to share YOUR room with him," his grandma said, raising her tone.

Napoleon stared at the two of them. His grandma rolled her eyes.

Giving up on informing Napoleon of what's going on, she leaves the room. Napoleon turned his attention to Uncle Rico.

"You know Napoleon, we don't have to start off like this if you learn how to let go."

Napoleon didn't say anything. It was his uncle that made him look like a freakin' idiot at Preston High. He wasn't about to forgive him. There had to be a reason for his coming back. He was good at ruining people's lives and eating everyone's steak, but there was probably a different reason he came back. And soon he would get to the bottom of it.

"Yeah right," Napoleon retorted.

"I'm a nice guy, Napoleon, but until you grow up you may not realize it."

Napoleon was tired of this. He ignored his uncle, and headed to his room.

At Pedro's House

Pedro and Deb were sitting on the couch, watching a movie. It was getting later, and Deb happened to notice the clock.

"Pedro, I think I should leave," she said.

Pedro nodded. It was getting late, after all, and even though it wasn't dark yet, it soon would be.

Pedro waved goodbye as he watched his friend step outside the door. Deb waved back and smiled. Pedro grinned a little, and went to make some popcorn.

At Napoleon's house

Napoleon was already ticked off again when Uncle Rico came into his room, took a good look at Napoleon's 'magical creature' pajamas, laughing.

As Uncle Rico settled in for the night, Napoleon turned to face the wall. Without a word, the lights were turned out.

It was a quiet night. The night sky had plenty of stars, and tonight they shined brightly through Napoleon's blinds, creating dim stripes of light that whimsically struck the interior of his room.

*Brrrrrrrt.*

Disturbed by the runny noise emitting from his uncle, he turned to face him with a disgusted look. His uncle turned to face him as well.

"Dang it, Napoleon, I really hope your grandmother teaches you some manners soon. Learn to show some respect."

Napoleon glared at him until he turned over again. His uncle had some nerve trying to blame that on him.

He wasn't the one who had a buttload of steak.

The next morning

Napoleon sat up. It was bright in his room now, even though it was early morning. His uncle snored, and he must have kicked his covers off during the night because his purple boxers were now exposed.

"Gross!" Napoleon muttered under his breath, stepping over his uncle to get to the doorway.

He exited the room, and headed to the fridge, but the phone rang.

Napoleon answered it.

"Hello?" said Napoleon drowsily, scratching his head.

"Napoleon! Where's your girlfriend?" asked a raspy voice, snickering.

"Who the heck is this?"

"That doesn't matter, I'm the one asking the questions! Heh heh."

Napoleon was really confused. Who the heck would call so flipping early on a Saturday morning?

"I don't even HAVE a girlfriend what the heck are you talking about?" asked Napoleon.

"Wait… hold on a second," he said. Napoleon heard his voice in the background, though, like he was holding the phone away from his mouth or something.

"_What's the girl's name? I can't mess with him if I don't know the girl's name!_"

Napoleon then heard another voice, shrieking angrily.

"_Let me go!_" she cried out. A couple of sneers were heard.

Napoleon recognized the voice, although he had never heard it in that kind of a scared tone before.

It was Deb, and she was being held captive.

"What are you doing to her?" Napoleon demanded.

"Oh, we're just holding your good friend Deb hostage until someone comes to get her. We're in your buddy's neighborhood right now, so why don't you… come rescue her? Toodles."

There was more sneering before Napoleon heard a click. 'Buddy's neighborhood'..? What was going on, anyway?

Napoleon had to act fast.

Without a moment's hesitation, he sprang into action. He grabbed some tater tots from the fridge, stuffed them in his pocket, and ran back to his room. Quietly, he crept past his snoring uncle and slid open the closet door. In it, next to a Merlin action figure, lay his secret weapon.

"Excalibur…" Napoleon muttered.

At Pedro's House

Pedro was dreaming about himself that night. He was a fierce warrior with a flippin' sweet mustache, and he was riding an animal… a unicorn, perhaps? He did not know, but he was roaming aimlessly in search of evil beings to slay…

All of a sudden, he heard glass being repeatedly tapped.

Still groggy, Pedro forced himself to look up towards his window.

And there, at his window, stood a warrior; a warrior bearing cardboard armor and wielding a wooden sword. But this wasn't just any warrior. This warrior had the bravery of a liger.

He opened the window. The knight spoke:

"Pedro, prepare for battle. Deb is a damsel in distress right now and she needs our help. We have to save her because the guy who called me is a freakin' IDIOT!"

TO BE CONTINUED—

LOOK OUT FOR CHAPTER 4, IT'S COMING SOON! GOSH!


End file.
